The Free Magical Motivator

One of the most powerful practices for building a high-trust team; one that operates as a cohesive, aligned and accountable unit is the simple act of acknowledgement, recognition, praise and gratitude. I use these words as synonyms throughout this book.

Why does this matter so much?

Committed and ambitious leaders tend to be overly critical of themselves and of others. They focus on the gaps rather than the progress, on what isn’t working rather than what is. That’s why one bad result can erase ten great ones from our consciousness.

Turning a leadership team into a highly aligned and accountable team takes courage and resilience, especially when leaders have to own their own role in creating the need for change in the first place.

CEOs sometimes try to convince me that criticism is what motivates them and their teams to perform. And in rare cases, that may be true. But for the vast majority of leaders and teams, constant criticism doesn’t motivate. It demoralizes.

I once worked with a CEO who never recognized his leaders or his team. He genuinely believed that recognition would breed complacency. So instead, he assigned extremely aggressive stretch goals, on the theory that “if they shoot for the sun, they’ll reach the moon, but if they shoot for the moon, they’ll only reach the sky.” But his team never hit their goals, and because they never hit them, he never recognized them, even when they had extended enormous effort trying to succeed. At first, everyone was upset and resentful. However, over time, it became worse: they became resigned and numb, and they stopped believing and expecting that they could generate the breakthroughs they wanted.

When a team commits to a bold, breakthrough future, that transformation will always surface every historical limitation, barrier and glass ceiling standing in its way. Confronting those challenges is mentally demanding work. That’s why, when I coach teams in driving their transformation, I always remind them that the name of the game is “Progress, not Perfection.”

The practice of acknowledgement, recognition, praise and gratitude keeps that perspective alive. It keeps people empowered and encouraged, and it reconnects leaders and team members with their own commitment, greatness, value and potential to make a real difference through the inevitable ups and downs of the journey.

Practicing acknowledgement, recognition, praise and gratitude isn’t hard. It takes no real effort, and it doesn’t cost a penny. What it does require is that leaders let go of the default ego-based, zero-sum mindset so many ambitious leaders carry, and replace it with genuine commitment, courage and generosity, the natural characteristics of a future-based mindset.

The impact of acknowledgement, recognition, praise and gratitude is nothing short of magical. It leaves people feeling energized, motivated, valued, appreciated, capable, and committed to achieving so much more, especially while going through tough terrain.

And yet, while everyone understands the merits of recognition, most teams and organizations fail to prioritize it, invest in it, or build it into their culture. In most companies, recognition lives almost entirely inside formal HR programs, disconnected from the daily rhythm of how people actually work together and what they’re dealing with.

One CEO I work with got so committed to this practice that he made it his mission to build it into the DNA of his company’s culture. He dedicated time at the end of every physical or virtual company and leadership meeting, no matter what else was on the agenda, for people to recognize each other. Most of his leaders followed suit, adopting similar practices in their own teams. It left a lasting mark on his culture, on people’s loyalty and commitment, and on his company’s performance.

Some leaders believe that too much recognition is inauthentic. Their claim goes something like: “If I recognized someone on Monday for going above and beyond, why would I recognize them again on Wednesday and Friday? I already told them the first time.” These leaders misunderstand the essence and impact of acknowledgement, recognition, praise and gratitude. They think it’s about sharing information and data. It isn’t. Recognizing someone means touching their heart, genuinely and profoundly. When it’s sincere, it makes people feel seen, known, appreciated and valued. When it’s sincere, there is no limit to how much of it you can give.

One last piece of advice: when you recognize people, talk to them, not about them. Say you want to recognize your co-worker Joe in a team meeting. Don’t look at the rest of the team and say, “I’d like to recognize Joe for staying every night this week to help me finish project X.” Instead, look at Joe and say directly to him, “Joe, I want to recognize you for staying every night this week to help me finish project X.”

If you want to add a powerful skill to your leadership toolbox, start practicing recognition daily. At first, it might feel somewhat contrived. But the more you practice, the more it will become part of your DNA and how you approach relationships and interactions.

Try it and see for yourself